A Blatant Title For A Post
What to others may seem to be revelations in their dreams, are nightly rituals for me. For many years I have been fighting a troubling past with many inconsistencies. At night in my rest, my dreams give me different perspectives as my semi-conscious tries to unravel what mess I have caused by “thinking.” It is safe to say that while I am a Thinking Man, I am also entering the boundaries of thinking-too-much-about-things-I-don’t-need-to-think-about. Except that I am extremely over zealous about it! So at night I pay attention to my dreams. They are sort of a wake-up call, when I need it.
Should the previous introduction be very confusing, continue to read on, folks!
Some times, dreams are depictions of the local issues that our conscious fights over during the day. Whether it be a bully at school, trolls online, a bill payment that is coming up, or stress at work/home. Yet many of the recurring dreams do not have a plot or a true setting, but truth be told – they do have a theme. Of course, this theme has to be solved by YOU. Nobody experiences the same things, and thus each theme is tweaked person to person. For this soul, the theme changes often, and thus it is becoming difficult to understand my theme. Find your theme, and chase it; your subconscious theme is your personal truth. Pay attention to your own dreams, and never stop making conclusions to what you see!
Of all the terrible thoughts I have had; Of all the treacherous dreams I have experienced; Of all the tragic memories I have shared; None of them have compared to the digging I have done to my own mind. This FoolishThinkingMan has in his life decided to enter the subconscious by day, and dig further underneath by night. Oh, and don’t let me tell you how dangerous this has been. What I found deeper than my subconscious were more memories. They were reflections of a time even before a conscious state – which leads me to believe that there can possibly be “consciousness before consciousness.” However, I am also skeptical about my experiences, perhaps, what if that experience was simply imaginary? Safe, or unsafe to say, I could rule out that all my memories are imaginary! That my entire life of experiences were made up, and that my conscious has developed a world in its own peril, to cease what horrible death awaits! But then, then I would begin to question my own existence! < This has happened before, yo. Oh, how insane it is to be an OverZealousThinkingMan. Also, it is rather nice to have writing quirks derived from someone rather jaded.
Okay, so after prying deep into what I believe to be my inner-subconscious, I recall finding memories. Each reflection had no visual, or physical state. However, they were closer to primal instinct. Those memories were the first few accounts of life, or even non-life, experiencing emotion for the first time. I mean, VERY first time. Well, some good news. When I found those memories, I became part of them temporarily! Bad news? I was in a mental state of having forgotten my emotions, and experienced them “like-new” in a conscious state having already faced them, but seeing their first incarnations, AGAIN. In short, IT WAS REALLY SCARY. Skeptical point of view: What I had done again, was imagine something that simply does not exist. In actuality (skeptically), the visions I saw were just projections of what I would believe were emotions for the first time.
So then… what are memories to begin with? I am running with too many theories, however I will share two – with a Skeptical POV for each.
Soy-lent Green IS People
First, each memory of our own that we experienced without imaginative tweaking is a solid memory that cannot be altered. However, at times people make off with hindsight and try to think of alternatives for what other things could have happened in their past event(s). In this theory, those imaginative thoughts are images of alternate realities. (do some research on the “infinite universes” theory in quantum physics, and otherwise.) Every time you alter a memory, you are actually creating an alternate universe. To think harder on this situation, that new idea has life. That universe you created has experienced birth, life, growing up, interacting, and living with worldy design until coming to the fork in the road you experienced – and that other being chose the other option. Now, try to think back to EVERY time you second-guessed yourself; think of every time you questioned a decision; ponder what could have happened if something were different. For every little thought, you have created a new universe for yourself – or, that universe already existed but you became aware of it! (Warning: You are not the center of any universe, including your own.) Skeptical Side: What a wild imagination.
The other theory is that all our memories are implants of someone’s experience not of our own. Even the current present imagery is something that another being has designed and implanted here. We are beings living on a rock deep in space, probably just dreaming of this life in order to escape. (See: Escapism in Japan) There are those among us who somehow “know” they are that being that will eventually perish outside of the dream (as we do perish in this dream as well) but they continue to dream inside dreams to avoid the end. (Oh, also see: Inception, Nolan, 2010) This theory is actually more ludicrous than the last, because it can be taken in so many directions! So many scary directions. Directions, such as nihilism and escapism. Belief in disbelief, and all that junk. Skeptical Side: What a wild imagination. Must be time to call the psych ward.
So while my Skeptical Side is going to dial up the local mental ward, I will wrap up this crazy post. Dreams are really fun, twisted, scary, and obscene. Sure, they sometimes do have a message, and they sometimes do not. But seriously folks, don’t be someone like me, who dives too deep into the mind and tries to come up with crazy explanations for the unexplainable. You might just become another televised Evangelist with another way to explain “God.” (Oh, another way to explain God will be a future post, keep that in mind.) Uh, in another way, you might just become a lunatic writer escapist like myself. Any way, I hope this post confused you, turned your head, because it was fun writing it!